Giving up doesn't always mean you are weak.

2008-05-23T11:08:00.002+08:00

graduation. finally officially finished poly life. 3-year man! can u believed it. it felt just like yesterday when all of us still enjoying first day at poly. n now it already over. sigh... start to miss poly life, the ppl, the frends especially the cheap food. well almost everything. n soon some of my mates are going to camp soon. wish u guys all the best ya!

HAPPY GRADUATION DAY!!

2008-05-06T17:01:00.002+08:00

cleared first week of training. the result is i dun understand at all what the programming language and how to used it. blur blur n more blur~~~

but not too worries as things not so bad. at very least i am awake for entire training's days.

Dear God,
may all will be alrights from now on. and please bless my father and his new family. may all the hatred in my heart be disappear soon. only time will tell all. and thank you for letting me remembering him the way he used to be.

2008-04-15T02:21:00.002+08:00

finally found a job. must thanks my aunt for her help in looking for a position for me. and the best part is it one of the biggest company i ever know. hopefully it will not be a job full with stress. and dont quite like with office politics too. when i think back, it feel so long ago and now, how far have i gone from 8 years ago. still remember i was coax to come here and study. very unwillingly but eventually i am here. many obstacles along the way but all already passed. now come new challenges.
still remembered my last moments before i came here. the times with all my friends together. all the silliest things we do together and all the laughter. i was told that i have grown up. not the same like before. the time for me to live my own life has finally come. the moment i was waiting like forever has come. and soon all will be paid off.
still waiting for the company to contact me for signing of contract. so still have some time to prepare myself for it. another chapter of my life soon going to take off.
but one thing for sure will miss all the care-free life. will miss all the frends and all the happy and sad moments together.

to all my friends: "ALL THE BEST IN LIFE" cheerrs!!!

2008-03-26T14:23:00.000+08:00

If the hero never comes to you
If You need someone You're feeling blue
If You wait for loving when You're alone
If You call Your friends nobody's home
You can runaway but You can't hide
Through storm and through the lonely night
Then I show You there's a destiny
The best thing in life
They are free

(Chorus)
But if You wanna cry, cry on my shoulder
If You need someone who cares for You
If You're feeling sad Your heart get's colder
Yes I show You what will love can do

If the sky is grey or latch Me know
There's a place in heaven where We'll go
If heaven is a million years away
Oh, just call Me and I make Your day
When the nights are getting cold and blue
When the days are getting hot for you
I will always stay here by Your side
I promise You, I'll never hide

(chorus 2 times)

2008-03-12T21:34:00.002+08:00

irritating for few days. how to find one simple job also so dam difficult. sigh... one job that i was looking forward to has rejected my application. sigh... how to life man. with no experience is so difficult to find one decent job. so eventually study for 3 years is equal to NOTHING if have no experience. so 3 years study is equal to waste of time ar??? HAIZ... Please job come soon. Already cant stand it rooting at home. another day pass with do nth really make even more tiring than doing work.

2008-01-03T18:30:00.000+08:00

meet many great people many great friends. can say life isn't so bad after all. but sometimes just feel tired. reasons, don't know. in search for the meaning.

2007-12-20T15:06:00.000+08:00

moments of waiting seems like forever. i already knew what must i do in future. however the time has not come yet. patience is all what i need for now.

2007-12-13T22:41:00.000+08:00

is everything in life is predestined. is everything regard our life had been writen long ago? is there a way to change our destiny? or is it we create and write our own destiny? is there a way to know what is writen on our destiny? fortune fame and life, the 3 basic in life everyone wish to know.

sometimes life is not fair. even though you have work hard for your entire life you can never taste what is success means.

grab every chances given to you and use them wisely. a smart man know how to use everything given to him to the maximum.

the higher you climb the harder you fall. but if you never go high up reached the star how you will you ever know what is a star looks like.

2007-11-29T21:59:00.000+08:00

back to school but also feelin very bored too. miss working life. but anyway since my last sem must work hard and play hard. and most importantly must play basketball till my heart content. my last chance to play, scare in future won't have time to play anymore.

2007-11-12T02:06:00.000+08:00

so many problems need to faced. when is it going to over? maybe there will be no end to all our problems in life. all i can do is brave it all and pray to GOD. asked for strength to carry on. strengh to faced it all. and a path to choose.

2007-11-05T22:10:00.000+08:00

a new life
a new beginning
a new day
a new chapter

a new dream

start something new...

2007-11-02T17:34:00.000+08:00

when you grow older ur responsibility getting more and more. look like i am going to stay in this place for good.

2007-11-02T17:25:00.000+08:00

pass my tp at first trial. good job for me. thought going to fail since do so many mistakes. but luck on my side. and i PASS haa. one of the best present for this year=) one expenses gone. can save more money from now on.

2007-10-31T00:24:00.000+08:00

unwanted day. nth good ever happened in this day for all this years

2007-10-29T21:01:00.000+08:00

when i die, i will surely go to hell, for what i am about to do.

4 more days to TP

2007-10-26T23:24:00.000+08:00

almost injured my angkle today while playing basketball. luckily nv really injured or anything. and been counting my expenses for next few years after graduate. the amount is huge when i reached the FINAL figures. where to get so much money. sigh. must start to save from now. although have save some till now but still too far from my target. must learn how to PLANT some money.

2007-10-24T20:10:00.001+08:00

working is tiring. cracking my brain for entire weeks now just to come up with a good design and user friendly. dam tired and exhausted. haiz.. when can go for long holiday?? last 4 weeks must work harder...

and anyone know anything about access database? i need help.. and looking for a good deal on psp slim, anyone got lobang??

2007-10-22T00:40:00.000+08:00

had a very strange dream last night. in my dream someone do a fortune reading on me and say that i will not live more than 30-year-old. strange... touch wood!!!

2007-10-18T22:15:00.000+08:00

2 more week to TP.

regrets all rash decisions. now only can regrets all of it. sigh! all bring toward own problems. my problems keep on adding like there is no end to it.

2007-10-13T22:28:00.000+08:00

having night blindness is really irritating. you cant see anything clearly at night. and i just noe that i have it too. haiz...

2007-10-13T13:23:00.000+08:00

if loving you and keep on waiting for you is so wrong. then i don't know what is right anymore.

2007-10-13T13:03:00.000+08:00

I’m always by your side
I can hear your heartbeat
Today and tomorrow too, no matter what time
There is only one answer
If you cannot see the future
I will still think about you without hesitation
I LOVE YOU
I only see you in my eyes. I want to tell you my feelings
You don't need to say anything, just your smile is enough
And one day, in our own world,
It will shine

2007-10-11T00:05:00.000+08:00

human born with nothing. but God give them heart. a heart to feel and grow strong. a strong heart will overcome anything that came. what you see with your eyes can be deciving. but what your heart can see is the truth. a broken heart can be mend. a broken heart can be healed. but the Queen's throne in this heart can never be replaced by another. keep on persevere till the end. with perseverance we can gain all our heart desire in life, love and work. I will keep on PERSEVERE till the end...

2007-10-10T00:52:00.000+08:00

bad headache for 2 days. so dam giddy. anyway there suppose to b a job exhibition. mayb should go there n check out some stuff for reference. anyway it time to find a job soon too. so time to make a right decision finally coming soon too. graduation...looking forward to it, the next stage of my life.

in such a short period of time u have grown to b more mature. i am happy for u. stay well!!!

2007-10-07T22:10:00.000+08:00

lost my way. soon finishing sch and must find work. but right now dont know where or what path to choose. i have many things to settle for but so little time. damn it!!! i hate it when i feel so weak. lose control of my life. and hate to say this but dam smoke is bad for health but still i goes on with it and it getting worse dam!! to all frends dun try it, it bad for ur health and pocket!!

2007-10-07T13:02:00.000+08:00

high on liqour and cigarettes

anyone noe about ACCA?

2007-10-04T21:49:00.000+08:00

stress stress and more stress... good thing more stress lose more weight...

working under-pressure

2007-10-01T22:32:00.000+08:00

feel so restless n tired. for whole day i am thinking what have i done so far? then somehow i feel so lost. lost the way, lost my destination in life. a man need to find their own path in life. looking for answer. and eventually i dont know what it is that i wan in my life. i feel so old, feel so incomplete. this feeling of incomplete making me feel so tired.

2007-09-30T23:14:00.000+08:00

i will keep on waiting. and sorry i cant fullfil my promise to live longer than you.

2007-09-30T12:01:00.001+08:00

i never felt nothing in the world like this before
Now I'm missing you
& I'm wishing that you would come back through my door
Why did you have to go? You could have let me know
So now I'm all alone,
Girl you could have stayed
but you wouldnt give me a chance
With you not around it's a little bit more then i can stand
And all my tears they keep running down my face
Why did you turn away?

[Bridge]
So why does your pride make you run and hide?
Are you that afraid of me?
But I know it's a lie what you keep inside
This is not how you wanted to be

[Chorus]
So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you

[Verse 2]
It's been a long time since you called me
(How could you forget about me)
You got me feeling crazy (crazy)
How can you walk away,
Everything stays the same
I just can't do it baby
What will it take to make you come back
Girl I told you what it is & it just ain't like that
Why can't you look at me, your still in love with me
Don't leave me crying.

[Bridge]
Baby why can't we just start over again
Get it back to the way it was
If you give me a chance I can love you right
But your telling me it wont be enough

[Chorus]
So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you

[Bridge]
So why does you pride make you run & hide
Are you that afriad of me?
But I know it's a lie what your keeping inside
Thats not how you wanted to be

Baby I will wait for you (For you)
Baby I will wait for you
If it's the last thing i do

[Chorus]
So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you

2007-09-29T22:18:00.000+08:00

please legs dont give up on me now!!! dam it!!!

2007-09-29T00:45:00.000+08:00

my world stirred up by your words

the forgotten day of ours

2007-09-28T00:07:00.001+08:00

nothing ever goes well right now. before was my throat which till now still feel pain. and now my both knee. overstress my both knee everytime play basketball or when training at gym. and the pain never gone till now. dam it. even want to stand up also difficult. mayb must let go basketballing. my only hope in life also going furthur. my only hobby. God please forgive me for destroying this body You gave me. i won quit basketball even if i will go cripple!!!

2007-09-27T22:28:00.000+08:00

life is short. time move too fast. for some, life is shorter and time move faster.

2007-09-25T21:52:00.001+08:00

smoke too much now pay the price

2007-09-25T00:03:00.000+08:00

still cant eat that well till today ever since fall sick. my throat is killing me and still keep on cough for no reason. mayb should follow what the doc say. go for check up and shall see how. but honestly scare to get news i dun wish to hear.

2007-09-23T17:50:00.000+08:00

jika aku masih ada waktu hanya satu permintaanku. mau melihat wajah mu untuk yang terakhir kalinya. tetapi berat rasa hati ini untuk menemuimu. semua yang dapat kuberikan hanyalah kesedihan. tetesan air matamu yang tak ingin kulihat. air matamu itu yang membuatku meninggalkanmu. yang membebani hidupku. yang memenjarakan jiwaku. sulit bagiku untuk melupakanmu. jejak kakimu yang telah terukir di dalam hati ini sudah tidak dapat dihapus. sewaktu aku meninggalkanmu, ku sangka kau kan bahagia. tetapi tidak. ingin rasa hati ini untuk memanggil mu. memanggil nama mu. memeluk diri mu walaupun sekejab. tetapi rasa takut menyelubungi seluruh hatiku. tidak sanggup melawan tidak ada alasan untuk melawan. kerap memandangi dan mendatangi tempat yang selalu kita datangi. hanya demi untuk melihat mu. mungkin sudah takdir ku untuk kehilangan dirimu. hanya ingin kau tahu, seberat apapun hidup mu, aku selalu mendoakan mu. selalu menunggu dirimu. untuk kembali kedalam hidupku. andai saja kau mengerti arti semua ini. hanya satu yang ku harapkan dari mu. hidup dengan bahagia sayangku. api dalam hidup ini masih menyala karena janjiku kepadamu. janji yang kali ini aku bersumpah untuk aku gengam sampai akhir hidupku. aku mencintaimu seumur hidupku walaupun kau tak mencintaiku lagi.

love is never lost. it just wait to be discovered by someone who knoe how to love.

2007-09-22T23:48:00.000+08:00

I want to be loved, but you don’t seem to love me
I wander within that repetition
I found one answer; that even if I’m scared, even if I’m hurt
I can say “I love you” to the person who I love

Do you love me? Or not love me?
As for things like that, it’s already fine either way
No matter how I wish
There are many unchangeable things in this world, right?
That’s right, and because only the fact of my loving you Is the truth unchangeable by anyone

I want to overcome the thousands of nights and tell it to you
There’s something that I must tell you
I want to be loved, but you don’t seem to love me
I wander within that repetition
I found one answer; that even if I’m scared
Even if I’m hurt, I can say “I love you” to the person who I love
It’s scary to turn my feelings into words
But I can say “I love you” to the person who I love

In this broad world, I can’t express the joy of encountering you with words
So we smile, sing about the vividly passing autumn in do-re-mi
Turn our backs on winter, wait for the sunlight streaming through trees in spring
And become reborn anew, so that we can protect someone

On the path we came from and our destination, when we looked back, I’d always have timid eyes
I want to face you, but I can’t be honest
I, who repeated days of not being able to straightforwardly love my partner
And hated being alone on that day
Seemed to love people while unwounded

I’ll overcome the thousands of nights and go meet you now
There is something that I must tell you
I want to be loved, but you don’t seem to love me
I wander within that repetition
I found one answer; that even if I’m scared
Even if I’m hurt, I can say “I love you” to the person who I love
Even if those thoughts aren’t fulfilled, I can say “I love you” to the person who I love
It’s the most wonderful thing in this world

2007-09-22T11:07:00.000+08:00

if there is regret in my life. i regret nv keep u by my side. i nv regret knowing you.

2007-09-21T18:16:00.001+08:00

took mc today. my body feeling so sick that even wan to sleep is very difficult. and just hoping tonight the fever won go up. cuz got the feeling it will. but luckily my pig cushion companion is there. can help to fall sleep also. dunno y it feel so warm today. feel like the one who give it to me. the warm and comfort. time to get back to sleep and rest.

2007-09-19T00:12:00.000+08:00

last sem result out. overall performance is so so just barely pass. which is good since i thought i will fail and also my failing rate is very high. but managed to pass. going to register for ACCA soon also. will see when they going to open the registration. fill my time with everything i can find to do. work and study. a no life person. sickening but must accept the truth. lifeless.

2007-09-17T23:10:00.000+08:00

emo song

2007-09-16T13:00:00.000+08:00

sometimes i just too heck care about everything around me. thus bring me to this state. i dont know how to appreciate everything i have till i lost it. mayb this is human nature. if only i can be more sensible maybe will never happen this way. can we turn back the time? if can maybe we will never end up like this. all maybe and if but in reality can it really happen. all i have gain, all my achivement means nothing without someone to share it with. nothing i can do. nothing i can hope. all hopes have been broken. all i can do is pray no matter where you are and what you do, there will be my angel watching over you. and i will continue to dreamt of you.

2007-09-15T00:52:00.000+08:00

went for another surprise meeting again today. still discuss about the same topic. and to my surprise my supervisor told me the man that came is our dep VP which mean our big boss. so shock since he doest have the look but he has the attitude. the way he speaks and think, everything. no wonder he speak in such authority tone when saw him during our first meeting. now i noe how it feel to work under stress. and must expect more work coming soon on monday. like the way they work and etc. best of all is my luck to get a good supervisor. but no luck in my other part of life. i hate september. emo month...

2007-09-13T23:00:00.000+08:00

went to my very first meeting with the supervisors. there are 3 supervisors that supposed to attend the meeting but oni 2 that came. very nervous especially haven done my work for the presentation. and also dun wan to bring problem for my attachment supervisor. so end up doing my work till 1 pm meeting and only go for 10 mins break. and manage to finish all by 4. shagged n tired some more slight cold and flu. was so nervous i end up posting wrong file into the server. damn... then must rush back to office and post it again. one thing i learn is that although all of those bossess speak softly and gentle but their words carry a heavy weight on you. wish in future i can speak like them. so cool!!! must learn as much as i can while i am working there.

2007-09-12T00:02:00.000+08:00

"so near but yet so far"

2007-09-10T00:04:00.000+08:00

first week of attachment passed. overall the work there is nice. good environment and the people there also nice. and my work currently just doing some admin stuff. although only admin work but learn lot things there, which you cant learn from sch. hopefully they wan to employed me in future after my graduation. 6 months to go. and for my pr. well work harder from now on.

dear GOD please guide me. i need your guidance desperately. and keep on protecting and keep her warm for enternity. i surrender all to YOUR ALMIGHTY will. AMEN.

2007-09-06T22:02:00.000+08:00

i have enough bad news around me and coming my way. i had enough of it please, GOD let everything goes well from now on. MOTHER MARRY please bless us all and all around me. dear JESUS CHRIST i beg you save me from this torment, this unworthy child. AMEN.

2007-09-03T23:14:00.000+08:00

feel like i have been drifting around. without aim nor goal nor motivation. why is it become worse with each passing days. how to pick up all the pieces? i still cant find the ans. will you come back? i am not me anymore. dont even knoe who i am or what i have become. i need you more than you think...

2007-09-02T00:34:00.001+08:00

working in the IT fair for 3 days now. this sunday is the last day. the working time and overall my job scope fairly easy. but one thing i cant stand is must stand for the entire day till it close and my legs is killing me. but lucky the boss is understanding regarding break. smoking break is a must to boost ur mental to fight the tiredness from your leg. and monday i am starting my attachment. lucky attached to same company as my classmate or else gonna be very lonely. and the location is best very near my house lol. but still dont know what is my job scope is.

2007-08-31T00:49:00.000+08:00

what would you do if you get chased out from your home? no where to go. homeless and suddenly missing the one who was always hold dear to you. missing the warm you longing to and reach your break down point where you see living life no longer have any meaning. and in that moment of despair one person come to your mind. the one you longed deep inside you. and only because of that person you continue on with a little light in your heart. even if that person doesnt feel the same, you still on hoping for it. slowly you will feel so tired. so tired till it rejects all logic. life or death have no difference to you. you worse nightmare keep on coming back. as if life itself never allow you to forget about the one you love most. it keep on coming and keep on coming till you unable to sense anything around you. and what you miss most is the imposible. and still you continue your life as normal. keep on smiling. but crying inside. crying like there is no tomorrow. tears that you thought have stopped, still flowing through in your heart, your vein, your whole body. a never end winter. and there is nothing you wish more than death to end all sorrow. but still you live on cuz that one person smile. a smile in your memory. a beautiful memory where you keep on living in. why do you keep on fooling yourself?

cuz love is to make us look like fool. as love it defy any logics and senses which make you go haywire. i still love that person.

2007-08-29T00:26:00.000+08:00

nothing to do for the whole day. initially was planning to sentosa but it been raining for the whole entire day till late afternoon. so sentosa trip was canceled. and today suppose to be full sun eclipse. but cant find a place to watch it. so end up wasting time at friends house and play lan games. haven been playing for long time. some how today play not like last time. not much feeling in it. guess getting bored for all this game etc. looking for some activities that more meaning in it. hmmm is it what it call growing up. haven have this kind of feeling for long time. and today my attachment company called me. where my working hours will be from 8am to 5.30pm, long hours but what to expect from full time working life style. and the sad part is no more studying or more like the best part lol...

2007-08-27T22:40:00.000+08:00

my future car

cool bike(gonna buy it with my first salary)

2007-08-25T22:18:00.000+08:00

yeah found job for next week. work in IT fair at suntec. nice!!! one week pass attachment soon. and still haven recieve any call from the company. think there will be no more call so there is no need to wait anymore. this coming wed is my ipp briefing shall see where i am going to attach to.

been going to bank this few days and meet this finance consultant. her facial and action, her build basicly her everything even her facial expression very similar to someone that once close to me. the only diff is their age. sigh!!! feel emo when meet her again at the bank. not only me say so but my 2 buds also say she looks like her. shit i hate this feeling. thought i have overcome this period but i am wrong. how little i noe about myself although i live with myself like forever. sigh!!! sometime you will never noe something for certain although you have live with them for ages or forever. human can never understand everything though they have learn everything. sigh!!! time will revealed man depest inner thought. or what my friend always say "time is the greatest revealer!"

2007-08-23T11:28:00.000+08:00

vitagen with collagen?? say will increase your body vitality and help improve your muscle and joint etc... sound too promising but it only for ppl age 25 and above... but can drink it although you are not tt age yet since prevent early can help your future. think i going to try it since having joint pains lately due to overly exercise. i am getting older sad!!!

2007-08-22T20:37:00.000+08:00

bad headache. so easy sick now. sigh... dun like this man. well better take panadol and go to sleep. nites all!!!

2007-08-21T23:17:00.000+08:00

dam bored today. practically nothing to do for entire day. oni in morning go for jog n some exercise with craw. other than that i am rooting at home. seriously need to find some activity to do man. or else i gonna end up sleeping for the entire day. and just realise how messy my cupboard is. so end up ironing all my messy clothes. mountain of clothes for me to iron. quite fun though. dunno y somehow in the past i hate it not to mention think about it. now it more relaxing than i thought. some how i am looking for something to do to divert my attention and kill time. kill 2 birds in 1 shoot. haha... and have not been smoking lately. feel funny and slight craving. but cant buy since no money to spend also since tml have driving lesson. and my tp is coming soon left with 2 more months.

2007-08-21T15:40:00.000+08:00

ive forgotten how long its been
since ive last heard from you
telling me your favourite story
ive thought for a long time
im starting to get worried
have i done something wrong again ?

you cried to me
"fairy tales are only lies"
"theres no way im your prince"
perhaps you dont understand
since you said you loved me
my skies..the stars started to twinkle

im willing to change into
the angel u love in those fairytales
ill open my arms wide
& turn them into wings to protect you
you must believe
believe that we'll be like a fairytale
with happily ever after as the ending

2007-08-21T14:38:00.000+08:00

some vid i found enjoy:)

2007-08-20T19:36:00.000+08:00

having last exam paper today. i actually awake for the entire night without sleep just to study that module. but dunno why i can still forget all about it inside the examination room. but overall doing well.

then went to sentosa with my EMO gang. our aim is to 100% tanned our skin but end up with 1/5 tanned. but it alrites will go again soon since we all are so free right now haha... no ppl at the beach also, feel like we are owned the beach. last 2 weeks of free days before start my attachment. and i worry since the supposed to be my company still haven called me. wondering what kind of company will i be posted into...

2007-08-18T21:58:00.000+08:00

this coming monday is my very last exam. no more exam after this. swee... waiting for attachment coming. after this graduate. finally 3 years in poly going to end soon. rooting enough there LOL. and still browsing around for nice part-time deg course. hard choice: hospitality-tourism and management or accounting and finance include ACCA. which ever i choose, i am going to meet with a dead end. cuz i am going to start all over again from zero. saddening fact to digest.

2007-08-18T00:57:00.000+08:00

my grandpa fall sick. went to doc and according to him, he may have dengue fever. sigh!!!

2007-08-17T11:49:00.000+08:00

fucked up.. y i am always get blamed for what i nv done.. sickening... yeah whenever everything went wrong who to blame....ME!!! yeah great!!!! nothing i ever do is always right in their eyes. i will always be the clumsy useless n childish... FUCKED!!!!

2007-08-16T22:29:00.000+08:00

let memories be a memories. do not taint it with ugly thoughts. looking forward to the future. create a new memories for us to remember.

2007-08-16T00:18:00.000+08:00

passed my certification. damn easy to pass...dunno why i can fail it also. waste of money and time too but at least i pass lol...swee haha.. thank GOD for listening to my prayer.

2007-08-14T23:56:00.000+08:00

went to library to study for whole day. well not actually whole day, slacking for sometime also lol. and the worse part is i end up at my friend house n smoking frenzy there for the whole lunch hour. but luckily manage to cramp all the chapters into my small little brain. left one more chapter to go. YIPPIEE!!!

dear JESUS CHRIST,
it been sometime since i pray to YOU. i am sorry all this time for forgetting YOU. thank you for all YOUR guidance in my life. thanks will never enough to clear my debts to YOU. my only prayer to YOU, please don't leave me when i need YOUR presence and guidance. thank you for listening to all my laments for all this time and for not leaving this worthless child. in name of Mother Marry and Holy Spirit and Father in Heaven please bless us all. AMEN. dan juga berkati la juga semua orang yang telah menyalahi hamba MU ini. amin.

2007-08-14T00:17:00.000+08:00

Don't take too long to say
"I love you" to the ones you love,
cause time has a habit of slipping away

Out on a clear blue sky,
when lighting strikes on a sunny day,
just take me in and keep me from the rain,

And the words that seem so hard to say,
come out when you've gone away,
stay a little while and hear me say,

That I want you here tonight,
and I need you by my side,
for just one more moment,
for just one more moment,
with you
Turn around to say goodbye,
with each and every word that passes by,
like a distant memory,
and time keeps slipping away,
and time will turn to grey,
and time will be the one who holds you down,

And the words that seem so hard to say,
come out when you've gone away,
stay a little while and hear me say,

That I want you here tonight,
and I need you by my side,
for just one more moment,
for just one more moment,

And I want you by my side,
and I need you here tonight,
for just one more moment,
for just one more moment,
with you

Sometimes time will treat you bad,
Before you even know what's wrong,
and in the end it hits you hard,
please tell me you'll be strong

2007-08-11T01:27:00.000+08:00

failed my ms certification. sigh!!! 50% of my module just slipped from my hand just like that. but i going to retake it. this time must pass by hook or by crook... come on motivation come to papa!!!

2007-08-09T20:05:00.000+08:00

is it ok to break as many heart as you can as long you can get what you want? hmmm been trying to do that but i guessed i am not a hard core bastard who can just break others heart n trust just to get what i want. if anyone out there who can do this, well just wish you a very good luck cuz the happiness you get will never last long. and karma. if you can do that to others, why cant other do the same thing to you. ALL COMES AROUND GOES AROUND. well some people dont believe in this kind of things. but better believe than regret ya!!!

2007-08-08T14:39:00.000+08:00

one problem come after another. sigh!!! more bad news are coming for me. brave myself for the heavy-storm that coming. all goes well ends bad...

2007-08-05T20:30:00.001+08:00

first wanna congrat one my bud chang wei. happy belated birthday man finally 21-year-old. haha... and please use ur present carefully dun wish any unwanted thing to happen. lol...nice outting for last night also lol... n went home at 5.20 am then rush to crawford house to help his mum with her abacus test thingy. finally drop dead on the way home. been sleeping like less than 1 hours... super duper tired... well time to get my project finished and get on with hibernation period... need my super long sleep after all of this project... lastly took my weight last friday n found out i have lost 5 kilos haa... keep it up man... hoho... one more thing. playing basketball without enough sleep is very unrecomended unless u wanna drop dead on ur way home.

2007-08-02T00:39:00.000+08:00

how to say someone is mature? how to differentiate which one is mature and childish? what makes a boy to be man? and a girl to be a woman? how to grow up? how to be a grown adult? how to behave like a full grown up man? what type of man am i?? so many question without answer... walking in circle... lost in my own circle...sigh!!!

2007-08-01T12:48:00.000+08:00

a shocking event happened. tried out my old pants. and surprisingly it can fit back again. after so long years. but didn't feel losing weight, instead like gaining. lol... miracles...

2007-07-29T21:49:00.000+08:00

"The worst feeling isn't being lonely; it's being forgotten by someone you would never forget"
by: Ivan

2007-07-26T02:30:00.000+08:00

Q:wat is luv?
a:luv is wen sum1 breaks urheart n d most amazing thing is tat u stil luv them wid evry broken piece..!

2007-07-26T02:10:00.000+08:00

U may be out of my sight, but not out of my heart, U may be out of my reach but not out of my mind.I may mean nothing to u but u will always be special to me!!

2007-07-23T23:54:00.000+08:00

found out that i am going for industrial attachment first for next semester. finally this sem going to end. without i realise it going to be 6 months. sigh...it has been so long...

2007-07-23T00:25:00.000+08:00

"Hate That I Love You"

As much as I love you
As much as I need you
And I can't stand you
Must everything you do make me wanna smile
Can I not like you for awhile? (No....)

But you won't let me
You upset me girl
And then you kiss my lips
All of a sudden I forget (that I was upset)
Can't remember what you did

But I hate it...
You know exactly what to do
So that I can't stay mad at you
For too long that's wrong

But I hate it...
You know exactly how to touch
So that I don't want to fuss.. and fight no more
Said I despise that I adore you

And I hate how much I love you boy (yeah...)
I can't stand how much I need you (I need you...)
And I hate how much I love you boy (oh whoa..)
But I just can't let you go
And I hate that I love you so (oooh..)

You completely know the power that you have
The only one makes me laugh

Said it's not fair
How you take advantage of the fact
That I... love you beyond the reason why
And it just ain't right

And I hate how much I love you girl
I can't stand how much I need you (yeah..)
And I hate how much I love you girl
But I just can't let you go
But I hate that I love you so

One of these days maybe your magic won't affect me
And your kiss won't make me weak
But no one in this world knows me the way you know me
So you'll probably always have a spell on me...

Yeaahhh... Oohh...

As much I love you (as much as I need you)
As much as I need you (oooh..)
As much I love you (oh..)
As much as I need you

And I hate that I love you so
And I hate how much I love you boy
I can't stand how much I need you (can't stand how much I need you)
And I hate how much I love you boy
But I just can't let you go (but I just can't let you go no..)
And I hate that I love you so

And I hate that I love you so.. so...

2007-07-22T23:23:00.000+08:00

getting tired. why is it very hard for poeple to understand me. is it that hard. i am quite doesn't mean i don't know anything. it just i don't wish to say anything. vexed!!! poeple grow up every single day. i am not the boy who just came here and need to be thought every single thing. before you realise it, that boy already long time gone. keeping too many troubles inside. feel so so tired. too much to take too much to handle... simply too much...

2007-07-21T02:23:00.000+08:00

living today to the fullest will lead to better tomorrow...

2007-07-20T09:31:00.000+08:00

oh, i carry a photograph
girl of the way you used to be
love looking back at me, now it's just a memory
you were all laughter then
and you were my light when it was dark
how did we lose our way, how did we fall apart
'cause something in our kisses
said love would never end
and deep down you still feel it too
but you won't let me in

so when you smile like mona lisa
my heart falls to pieces
('cause) smiling just can't hide
all the sadness in your eyes
if i could only hold you
love you like i used to
but girl what can i do
when you smile like mona lisa

the way that i held you close
the way that you whispered my name
we made a work of art
know there's just an empty frame

all we had
baby we could have again
and deep down you still feel it too
but you won't let me in

so when you smile like mona lisa
my heart falls to pieces
('cause) smiling just can't hide
all the sadness in your eyes
if i could only hold you
love you like i used to
but girl what can i do
when you smile like mona lisa

so when you smile like mona lisa
my heart falls to pieces
('cause) smiling just can't hide
all the sadness in your eyes
if i could only hold you
love you like i used to
but girl what can i do
when you smile like mona lisa

i carry a photograph
girl of the way you used to be...

2007-07-20T03:05:00.000+08:00

somehow today feel less stressfull n less emo. nice feeling... and i am nearing bankrup. can start worry about my school work. no interest in continuing anymore. maybe i should quit schooling. but then my 3 years of work will be wasted just like that. not worth it ya... well will just aim for pass. it all i can do for now. every single thing went wrong... frustration...

2007-07-18T23:24:00.000+08:00

sometimes you can't do everything by yourself. you need people around you to help you pull through everything. why suddenly i become such a weak person?

2007-07-17T21:11:00.000+08:00

looks like i am going to fail this semester.

2007-07-17T00:38:00.000+08:00

feeling so tired. keep trying to smile while i actually not feel like smiling. feel my life so fake. talk to my friend. he say "if you loved someone and you can find another person so easily to replace him. is it called love?". all promises are broken. all dreams are shattered. love is crap. a rubbish talk who only those that believe will say. learn it the hard way. love is nothing much than a dream. dream will always remain as a dream. love is the most lethal poisonous subtance in the world. first it will drunk you and make you feel high. next it will kill you instantly. no more for me. for my heart had died...

2007-07-16T23:26:00.000+08:00

my zippo lighter

my cigarettes case

went to Far East to buy these. looks cool so decided to buy it lol..

2007-07-16T01:52:00.000+08:00

found this pic. nice. suit what i feel for now. it's getting harder each day to live

2007-07-16T01:35:00.000+08:00

Some say love it is a river
That drowns the tender reed.
Some say love it is a razor
That leaves your soul to bleed.

Some say love it is a hunger
An endless, aching need
I say love it is a flower,
And you it's only seed.

It's the heart afraid of breaking
That never learns to dance
It's the dream afraid of waking
That never takes the chance

It's the one who won't be taken,
Who cannot seem to give
And the soul afraid of dying
That never learns to live.

When the night has been too lonely
And the road has been too long.
And you think that love is only
For the lucky and the strong.

Just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snow
Lies the seed that with the sun's love,
In the spring, becomes the rose.

2007-07-15T09:12:00.000+08:00

humans heart and soul are so fragile. cant withstand hardship nor temptation. when everything goes wrong, you have none other than yourself to rely on. support from people around you will always remain as support. you will need to pull yourself together to move on. my perfect world, slowly but surely are collapsing. idolisation, guidance none is left. nothing left but myself. eventually none i can rely on except myself. stay strong!!!

2007-07-13T21:29:00.000+08:00

starting to get irritated with my life. one after another. all my problems, all come to find me. think i what. problem solver ar... one day all of this problems will kill me soon...soon...everything goes very wrong. if i have all the money, everything will be solve. i have nothing left.

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!

can't controled myself anymore!!!!!!!!!! i almost punch the stupid aunty at e printing shop. fuck you la. not my fault and she scold me. and went back to class and someone took my fucking chair. my leg already killing me and still someone took my chair. fuck la... ARGH!!!

2007-07-11T22:54:00.000+08:00

went for smu talk. not much info i can get as there are none of the smu lecturer there. all there are only those poly students who went to smu and give talk about life in smu.

still need to rush for project. left with 3 mere short weeks to complete all the works. my last studying semester. shall earn as much points as possible. finally graduation day are getting nearer. soon will leave sch life and maybe will miss it. left with few weeks of studying. yeah finally, cant wait till the day come.

after sch went to play basketball with fabian and some of his team mates. learn a good lesson today. compare to them my speed and stamina still far behind. feel like so noob when playing with them. knoe my limit. and will break it. anyway limits are meant to be broken. and i maybe a little bit put too much stress on my knee while playing. end up having difficulies to walk after that.

time is passing too fast sometimes. making you unable to enjoy all the good things in world.

2007-07-10T21:07:00.000+08:00

finally collect my pay cheque. initially was planning went to bugis for gym right after sch. but canceled due to my pay cheque. no body could collect it for me thus must went down and get it by myself so end up not going to gym. then the lady boss was asking whether we all could work for next week. still considering but most likely will work. yeah another source of income for me lol.

work work work

2007-07-10T10:14:00.000+08:00

wanna congrat my EMO friend. it's his birthday today haha. congrat man all best wishes for you!!

and i am late for class. still at home lazy to go. shooot la....each day passed it getting bored...........

2007-07-08T23:04:00.000+08:00

when you are unhappy admitt that you are. there is no point in hiding it. it will only make you feel worse. after a good cry everything will be ok and you will be able to feel happy once more.

2007-07-08T06:10:00.000+08:00

just come back from clubbing. overall today clubbing is fun though a bit squezzy but still it is fun. addicted to their liqour haha... but it too ex for my pocket to handle. must find work to support it haha. nice songs nice babes around and nice dancing wooooottt.... must go more lol... liqour smoking n clubbing my life getting more bold these day lol. this is what it called enjoying while you can. lets release the "beast" inside!!!

oh ya and i am looking for guitar. anyone knoe where to buy one good guitar at cheaper price??

2007-07-07T14:14:00.000+08:00

watched this jap show about love. a truely nice show. but this kind of love will only happen in movie not in reality. true love, does it exist? can it last till end of time? will it able to go through all obstacle? i guess nope. there are no such thing that will last forever. life with the flow anything come to you it just a bonus. letting go is one of lesson in life.

2007-07-04T10:36:00.000+08:00

first of all i wanna congrat my budd, hanyu. he graduate from nyp today and joining nus by next august. congrats man!! knoe you will make it far. but guessed as much since u are dam good at studying lol. well looks like we cant play basketball anymore since we all staying so far away. but still good luck in nus and please find some pretty gals from nus for me lol...

2007-07-01T01:11:00.000+08:00

this year is a bad year. just found out from my aunt that my youngest uncle had divorce. nothing will last forever. is it true? i hate this kind of feeling. and i hate myself for remembering the past. am i still running away?

2007-06-30T00:07:00.000+08:00

feel so lifeless. wanna go working but cant work now. only can wait till time i can start full time work. well anyway today went to watch movie transformer. and get a pair of adidas shoes. wanted to buy the bag also buy way over budget. shall wait till my pay come first. till then can only browse around. and still cough like hell and it gets worse especially at night.

2007-06-28T23:46:00.000+08:00

felling so tired. don't know what wrong. been training all days but still can feel tired easily. cant keep eyes open in class or in bus or anything. sleeping disorder i guess. anyway these last 2 weeks have not been going gym as much as usual. shall continue my training by next week.

another thing is although i regret to admit it, but looks like i cant stop smoking. without it i feel so lethargic.